Fucking Sassy

Once my sister told me to smile for a picture and I did and she said “no, not your creepy smile.”

Anonymous asked: You have the same birthday as my mom. Are you my mom.

pmon3y69:

no

zftw:

genderthief:

i gave my dog a tortilla chip ten minutes ago and she won’t fucking eat it she’s just staring at me with it in her mouth 

she’s waiting for the salsa

zftw:

genderthief:

i gave my dog a tortilla chip ten minutes ago and she won’t fucking eat it she’s just staring at me with it in her mouth 

she’s waiting for the salsa

(via guy)

adrians:

adrians:

the best thing about having the house to myself is that I can make breakfast in my underwear

image

(via guy)

guy:

“do not machine wash or tumble dry” means i will never wash this ever

aresnakesreal:

like imagine if you’d never seen a dog and you saw a saint bernard and you were like, what’s that and then someone was like, thats a dog. and then you saw a chihuahua and you were like ok whats that and they were like, that’s a dog. wouldn’t you feel lied to? wouldn’t you sense that something was amiss

(via guy)